I feel great joy at having rediscovered nuances of the expression “People often ask me….” It is a charmingly deflective way of being opinionated without the burden of sounding opinionated. Or at least that’s what I think.
What it says is that far be it for me to consider myself so important as to express an opinion, but I do so only because “People often ask me…” The other day I started my post with it. I intend to make it an occasional practice. (I have already clarified that no one ever asks me anything).
So, people often ask me what I think of Republican presidential candidate Mitt Romney strapping his pet dog Seamus in a kennel on top of his car during a drive from Boston to Ontario, Canada in 1983. Pet lovers and not-so-pet lovers are reportedly outraged at Romney’s conduct which may have some mildly amusing political repercussions as he goes about seeking his party’s nomination. We do not yet whether this could terminally damage his prospects or merely provide a silly sideshow for a while.
Be that as it may (another expression I love for its nebulousness), I think the outrage is entirely a case of how consciously and not so consciously we have created a caste system among animals. What if Romney had strapped a wicker basket full of chickens atop his vehicle and driven the same route with feathers flying? Mind you, the chickens are meant for a feast on arrival. I doubt very much if pet lovers would be as outraged.
People love dogs because the animal responds mostly unselfishly to every human whim unlike chickens which do not seek to strike heartwarming relationships. They do not snuggle up to their owners or slobber over them. Ironically, unlike dogs, poor chickens even provide eggs which are consumed in a million different ways. Dogs only poop which their owners have to bag.
Would people be similarly outraged if a bunch of mice was ferried in a cage on top of a car? I seriously doubt it. And how about a jar full of cockroaches or box full of skunks?
The point is pet lovers follow an unconscious caste system which is inherently discriminatory. I understand that one cannot be emotional about all sentient beings but the least one could do is not to turn certain species into deities.
Animals are not born to be domesticated to the extent humans have done in certain cases such the horse or the cow or the dog or even the chicken and the pig. And if we do indeed insist on domesticating them, let’s not pretend that they cease being animals. We do so purely out of utilitarian reasons.
If you still do not know where I stand on Romney’s cavalier canine conduct (a terrible mixed metaphor), then get in the line. Even I do not quite know what I am saying. I am saying it because people often ask me.
