Conscious that it is not a particularly healthy sign that one latches on to a non-existent figure in one’s painting, I am still going to say that this morning I have latched on to this girl in my pastel on paper.
As she sits by a window smoking, I wonder what she is thinking about.
Perhaps her mind is blank.
Perhaps she is in the midst of a perverse version of mindfulness meditation. I say perverse because she is smoking and I am reasonably certain that mindfulness meditation cannot be about tobacco-laden breath.
Perhaps she has just returned from work and enjoying an occasional cigarette. It could not be a weekend because it does not feel like that looking at the picture.
Or may be, she is contemplating a breakup.
It is equally possible that it is the end of the month and she is worried about the bills, having rented an expensive apartment beyond her income.
Most likely though it is none of the above because she is not real and I am losing it.
